The Upcoming Months

Today is day six of taking Clomid and I'm proud to announce that I feel amazing. This is the last cycle I'll be taking Clomid and I've experienced no side effects. I can only hope this cycle is going to be a breeze.

My next appointment with Wandy is on Monday. I hope to get good news that my ovaries are doing their job and producing lots of follies. Our IUI should take place sometime next week. Wouldn't that be something if this one worked! Last times a charm (I hope).

We will be taking the month of October off because of our much needed vacation. We will be flying into St. Louis, MO. My DH is from Missouri and we are excited to spend a whole week with friends and family. Oh yeah and DH is standing up in his good friend B's wedding. Oh how I'm looking forward to a week away and off of work. Where my DH is from is out in the sticks. There is nothing but land, cattle, a church, and a bar but it's a good ole time. When we return I will begin my injections two weeks later (ouch!).

I'm looking forward to the month of November. Our egg retrieval will be on the 14th, 15th or16th. Then our transfer will be on the 17th, 18th or 19th. My RE wants me to take off work from the 14th to the 30th and 10 of those days will be bed rest. Let me just say right now... that's not going to happen. I'm work in retail management so my big boss will not be happy if I take those days off. The reason why my RE wants me on bed rest for 10 days is because of the work I'm in. I'm going to talk with him on Monday and see if we can do just five days of bed rest, that way I'll be up and running by Black Friday. My boss is very supportive with my IVF and is willing to work around appointments and bed rest, it's my big boss I'm worried about.

One of the biggest decisions we have to make regarding IVF is how many embabies to put back in my uterus. Two or three? My RE suggests three but let's keep in mind they can split and reduction is out of the question. I've prayed long and hard for a baby and if God blesses me with babies I'm not going to give some back because it was too many. My DH and I are leaning towards two but I know I will be so heart broken if it's unsuccessful and will regret not doing three. I'm just so unsure on what to do and what's right.

I'm filled with all kinds of emotions regarding IVF. I'm anxious, nervous, scared and happy but most of all hopeful. We want so bad to have a baby! We want to be able to fill the extra bedroom with baby furniture. I want to be able to take all the baby clothes out of our hope chest and use them. I envision my DH teaching our son to throw a spiral in the front yard and watching our daughter's dance recitals. I pray every night God will bless us with our "miracle baby". I have so much hope for the future and will continue to have hope until our dreams come true.

Lucky Number 6?

I've decided since I've never actually blogged while I was in the process of a cycle... this month I have every intention of blogging A LOT! I've learned that getting my emotions "out" helps tremendously with my stress level during a cycle.

Well unfortunately here I am again starting another cycle.

I started my Clomid yesterday and will be taking it the rest of the week. Clomid usually makes me sick and emotional. So far, so good this cycle. Don't take me wrong.... I'm not complaining. Clomid can make me as sick as "it" wants, as long as my ovaries produce follies, I'm a happy camper.

This is the last cycle of IUI we'll be doing. If it is another failure, we are planning to do IVF in November. My DH thinks this one is it. God bless him for always being positive, optimistic, supportive, and just awesome. I can't wait for the day that I can tell him we're pregnant. Well... let's hope this month has a happy ending.

Emotions

As I am coming close to the end of my 2ww, I'm feeling all sorts of mixed emotions. I'm mixed between happy, sad, hopeful, excited and many more. I have a good feeling about this last cycle of IUI. That "good feeling" leaves me happy, hopeful, and excited. I have also experienced this "good feeling" in the past and as we all know I wasn't pregnant. Then it left me sad, angry, frustrated, and hopeless. I'm to the point where I'm giving up with IUI. As much as I want it to work, I just know it isn't going to. We still have to do one more cycle of IUI before we can move on to IVF. If this cycle and the next is a failure, IVF is scheduled for November. We will be taking the month of October off because of our vacation to my husband's home town of Missouri. I'm really hoping to be pregnant by Christmas.